God sets a wonderful example for us in how He cares for and encourages His children. In “The Encouragement of the Father,” we looked at how God encourages us by his devotion, his sensitivity and compassion, the way He promotes and pursues peace, and blesses and forgives His children.
In Romans 12, Paul writes about the responsibility of the believer to care for and encourage our spiritual family. These responsibilities perfectly reflect God’s ways toward us. While we are exhorted to encourage other believers, Paul also reminds us in 1 Timothy that we should turn our attention first to our physical family.
“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
1 Timothy 5:8
This Scripture is clear – meet the needs of your household first. Meeting physical needs is necessary, but let’s not forget the importance of encouragement! I love the list Paul gives us in Romans 12:9-21 titled, “Love in Action.”
Be devoted to love…
Love sincerely and be devoted to that love.
We need to demonstrate tender, unselfish love to each member of our family. The key word here is demonstrate – how can you show that love?
Share and practice hospitality.
When we are devoted to something, we pursue it faithfully, and we can do that by sharing with one another and practicing hospitality with our own people.
“Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”
Romans 12:13
Be sensitive and compassionate…
Set the tone for joy, patience, and faithfulness.
Set the tone of encouragement in your home by the way you respond to and pray for each person. Model joy, patience and faithfulness to others and pray for them to follow your example as you follow the example of Christ.
Be sensitive and join others in their celebrations and in their sadness.
Pay close attention to the feelings of others and listen carefully to their hearts. We feel most heard and seen when we are met with understanding and respect for our feelings. Cheer your people on and take the time to sit with someone who is sad.
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”
Romans 12:15
Pursue and promote peace…
Put others first and look to God to meet your needs.
Perhaps the most difficult place to be selfless is at home – expectations run high – but if we look to God to meet our needs, He will reward and bless us. Many times, when we serve one another without an agenda, we will find others following our lead.
“It is easy for us to decide that we have nothing left to give. We might say that we are exhausted, needy, used up, or beaten up. We might want to hide in a hole or lash out at irritating people around us when we feel this way, but that is not what God expects for us as His ambassadors. He wants to bring our tired and empty hearts to Him so He can fill us back up. We can exchange our dry, brittle spirit for a soft, pliable heart that has room for all of His love.”
- Wendy Custer, excerpt from “Godly Relationships“
Be a peace-seeker and a peacemaker.
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Romans 12:18
I am learning more and more that I cannot do this on my own. It requires a super-natural intervention from God to settle my own heart down and to trust Him to make peace between people. The good news is that God is a peacemaking specialist and He loves to do it! I use a strategy that I call the 3 P’s to help me in times of conflict in my own life.
The 3 P’s:
Pause – take a breath and wait before responding.
Pray – ask God to intervene in my own heart and in the heart of others involved.
Preach – to MYSELF and remind myself of God’s truth and His promises.
- Wendy Custer, excerpt from “Godly Relationships“
Bless and forgive…
Serve others even when they feel like the enemy.
God is very specific on this – we are to bless, forgive, and serve our enemies (or those who feel like the enemy in the moment) and leave any avenging to Him. This may be the most difficult thing to do, but we can trust that God is able to make things right because he is just. Anything we do for revenge is evil and does not please God.
Cling to what is good.
We had a rabbit once that latched its teeth onto the cage wire to prevent being removed from his hutch – true story. Funny picture, but this is the type of clinging we need to do – holding on to good by the skin of our teeth! And I find it takes this kind of persistence because I am constantly tempted to return to selfish motives and expectations. Sadly, they never achieve victory for me. The kind of victory I am looking for is only won when I give it all over to God and let Him have His way with me and my family – no wonder this passage is sandwiched with this concept.
“Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
Romans 12:9,21
Friends, we are responsible to encourage our people. When we look to God and seek His ways, He will give us the opportunities to encourage and the blessings will abound!