by wendy | Jul 30, 2020 | Encouragement, Godly Relationships, Hospitality, Prayer, Tips for Encouraging Others
Tuesday seemed like a day for everything bad to happen! All day long I received news of difficult things that people I know were going through. Several people fell and were seriously injured, a house burnt down, a friend began to notice signs of dementia in a loved one, several of my kids had stressful days, it seemed to go on and on. Even those who didn’t experience specific trauma seemed weary – the world seems weary.
I often have to remind myself that, while I want to be supportive, I need to not take on the weariness of others. Instead I must search for ways to encourage those that are weary. I need to pause, pray, and preach to myself so I can find my strength in the Lord and pass on that strength to those that need it.
“The Sovereign Lord has given me a well-instructed tongue, to know the word that sustains the weary.”
Isaiah 50:4
Here are a few ideas for encouraging the weary:
1.Share the Word
God’s strength is available for each of us. His word gives us hope – and hope strengthens us! Share Scripture on your social media, write a verse in a card (or use one of the enclosure cards in the newsletter this week!), memorize Scripture so you can share it in the moment, post Scripture in your home, car, and office.
2. Give a gift
My Bible Study group once gave me a gift card for a massage when I was going through a very difficult time. A friend sent me a book of uplifting stories when I was down. Gifts are wonderful expressions of encouragement and can be practical and meaningful at the same time. An inspirational print, a gift card for coffee or a treat, a pretty scarf or t-shirt, a new mug – so many ideas!
3. Sit and Listen
Invite someone over to sit in your space and relax. Whether you offer a cup of coffee, breakfast or lunch, or a glass of ice water on the back porch – just providing someone a safe place to rest is key.
4. Say a Prayer
After listening to someone pour out their heart about their struggles and exhaustion, ask if you can pray with them. A simple prayer to ask God to give them rest and to thank Him for what He is doing is all that is needed. The best encouragement we can offer is to carry someone right into the presence of God!
5. Share Your Story
It is difficult to find hope in the midst of weariness. A tired and empty spirit is often dry and weak. When you share your experience of how God has lifted you out of those times, you share hope and give strength. Even if your experience is not identical (it never is!), just the reminder that God is able can be enough to pull someone out of the pit of despair and give them an anchor to hold on to.
“For I will satisfy the weary soul, and every languishing soul I will replenish.”
Jeremiah 31:25
by wendy | Jul 28, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Focus on God, Godly Relationships
Jerry and I went for a walk early this morning. We know we should exercise every day, but today we actually did it. We walk down our rural road – under the shade of the trees that hang over the pavement, past the cows on the neighboring farm, sometimes all the way to the creek in the curve at the bottom of the hill. It is a pleasant walk on the way down, but we trudge uphill all the way back! As I struggled to keep up with my husband this morning, I had to keep reminding myself that walking is an important discipline to strengthen my weak legs.
“No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.”
Hebrews 12:11
There are so many things in life that are hard. It seems like this particular time in the world is more difficult than any I can remember before. I often hear people complain that if God really loved us, He wouldn’t allow us to go through difficult things. I even read a post recently that suggested that God enjoyed our disappointments. I thought about all the times I have allowed my kids to go through something difficult because I knew they would grow from it and I remember that it is my love that kept me from “saving” them from the struggle. I want my children to be strong and able to withstand the storms I know they will face, so I lovingly walk alongside them through challenges instead of taking on those challenges for them. I am grateful to know that my Heavenly Father walks alongside me as well.
“Endure hardship as discipline, God is treating you as His children.”
Hebrews 12:7
Even as difficult as those hills are on our journey back home, I always choose that particular road for our walk instead of the street in front of our house. There are less hills to climb along that way, but there is a long stretch of road that tilts sideways and my ankles have a tendency to turn. While my legs are typically screaming on that last incline, I would much prefer a steep but level path than risk injury along the easy way.
“Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. Make level paths for your feet, so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed.”
Hebrews 12:12-13
We should be able to apply this same concept to our attitude toward life and righteousness. We can choose the more difficult path over the easier path that might lead to a fall or setback. Doing the right thing is hard, living a holy life is strenuous, forgiveness and mercy and love require constant effort and choice. The Bible uses words like throw off, cast aside, resist, make every effort, endure – this is not light and fluffy language – we should not be fooled into thinking the journey will be easy.
“Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.”
Hebrews 12:14
Suddenly I understand – strengthening my weak self is not just about me – I choose to follow God’s ways because it helps others to be strengthened as well. When I can choose to be holy, do the right thing, forgive, love, show mercy, I am a picture of God’s love to the world. Choosing the level path for myself welcomes others to walk alongside me and invites them to experience righteousness and peace as well.
“Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”
Hebrews 12:3
The level path is not popular – many will scoff at our choice to take the hard way. But we have so many examples of faithful followers who chose it anyway. Enjoy the journey. Notice the blessings along the way. Strengthen your arms and your knees and use that uphill march to remind yourself that God is walking alongside and encouraging you all the way home!
“Therefore since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders us and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.”
Hebrews 12:1-2
by wendy | Jul 23, 2020 | Encouragement, Godly Relationships, Tips for Encouraging Others
“See that you do not despise one of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels always see the face of my Father who is in heaven.”
Matthew 18:10
Just about every encouragement tip we talk about here can be applied to the children in your life as well, but here a few ideas specifically for encouraging the children in your life:
- Let them know you see them.
Everyone needs to know they are seen. Make eye contact with children you see. Smile. Say hello. Call them by name. You never know how meaningful that could be to a child who feels unseen.
- Encourage them to try new things.
Most things are new experiences for children. How will they know what they are good at if they don’t try things? Do you remember the time when you first tried the thing you love to do most? Whenever possible, encourage kids to try new hobbies, new foods, new experiences.
- Remind them that it is okay to fail and affirm their resilience.
Rarely does a person get things right the first time. Kids need to know that they can fail and they need to experience recovery from a failure. We learn most when we have to try again. Resilience and perseverance are more healthy than perfectionism.
- Notice their passions and gifts.
Just as I shared in my post yesterday about the teacher that noticed my artistic ability, my parents were also a great encouragement to my sister and I to pursue the things that we loved. It only takes a small amount of observation and conversation to discover a child’s passions. Simply showing interest and asking questions will encourage them.
- Teach them about something you love.
Take the time to teach a child about something you love to do. Invite them to join you while you cook or bake, show them how to knit or crochet, teach them a favorite card game or how to bait a hook, ask them to help you fix the car or weed the garden. You might just spark an interest they never would have known they had.
- Ask them about their highs and lows.
When you ask a child about their highs (the best things that happened today or this week) and lows (the worst thing that happened today or this week) you are showing an interest in how they really feel about things. When we show others we value their opinions we give them the confidence to speak up.
Other variations:
“What was the best thing and the worst thing about your vacation?”
“What is your favorite character in the book/movie and your least favorite?”
“What food do you like best? What food do you like least?”
Everyone needs to feel heard. Take the time to listen to a child. Ask questions and respond to what they are saying.
Pray with and for children. When our children were younger, we prayed with them each night. We started with the oldest child to the youngest child and then Jerry and I. I loved hearing their hearts as they prayed for others and I know it was meaningful to them as they heard Jerry and I pray for each of them by name. Ask children how they would like you to pray for them and then give them confirmation that you have been praying.
- Tell children where you have seen God at work in your life.
When you talk about how you see God at work, it helps children to learn to look for Him at work in their lives as well. We need to pass along the stories of God’s love, provision, and protection to our kids. When we share our faith, their faith grows and develops.
“I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.”
3 John 1:4
by wendy | Jul 22, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Trusting God
Painting in Progress by Wendy Custer
When I was in fourth grade, my teacher noticed my artistic ability. She called it out and encouraged me to continue. I am sure there were other things that led me in that direction as well, but it is that particular moment that I remember defining my future calling as an artist.
Adults have an incredible opportunity to encourage the little ones in our lives. Parents, grandparents, teachers, aunts and uncles, neighbors, babysitters – these are all the obvious influencers in a child’s life, but every one of us have an opportunity to notice and encourage children. Every smile, positive comment, and shining example plants a seed that germinates beneath the surface.
Every encouragement we offer children is important, but the most important encouragement we can offer is the encouragement to strengthen themselves in the Lord! It is this legacy that will serve our children regardless of what worldly direction they follow.
“Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
When Moses gave God’s commandments to the Israelites at the foot of the mountain, he reminded them of the need to teach their children about following the Lord. Their children had not seen and experienced God the way they had – but they could pass down the stories of God’s love, protection, and provision – and His ways.
“Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads.Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates, so that your days and the days of your children may be many in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors, as many as the days that the heavens are above the earth.”
Deuteronomy 11:18-21
Moses was teaching the people to encourage themselves in the Lord and how to teach their children to encourage themselves in the Lord. This was the inheritance they wanted to pass down to the next generation – trusting God, relying on God, knowing God! If they could learn to call on Him and to depend on Him, Scripture says their days would be many!
“How, then, can they call on the one they have not believed in? And how can they believe in the one of whom they have not heard? And how can they hear without someone preaching to them?”
Romans 10:14
We often rely on other people to teach our children. We might expect that the preaching should come from the Pastor or the Sunday School teacher, and it should, but every believer should be speaking the word – with words and with our lives. When we share the stories of how God is at work in our lives, we are training others – children and adults – to see Him at work in their lives as well.
“But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have become convinced of, because you know those from whom you learned it, and how from infancy you have known the Holy Scriptures, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus.”
1 Timothy 3:14-15
As Paul reminds Timothy to continue in the ways he was taught by his mother and grandmother, we are reminded that our words and teaching have lasting significance in the life of a child – and that our investment in their faith will ripple out to affect generations to come as they continue in what they have learned!
by wendy | Jul 16, 2020 | Encouragement, Godly Relationships, Hospitality, Tips for Encouraging Others
The Bible specifically tells us to care for the widows among us.
“Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world.”
James 1:27
I think widows often go unnoticed and underserved because they are so often the caretakers. While widows of today might not be in such dire straights as they were in biblical times, we must understand that they are still in need of our encouragement. Take some time to look around and think about who the widows are – in your church, in your neighborhood, and in your family.
Here are some specific ideas for encouraging widows:
1.Visit!
Living alone is – well – lonely. Even the most independent widow would probably enjoy some company from time to time. My friend, Tracy, and I have been having coffee chats with our neighbor widow, Agnes, for years.
2. Listen
Older widows have so much life experience to share. I often ask Ms. Agnes, “How did you handle this?” and “What was that stage like for you?” Her stories and wisdom give fresh insight for many of my life issues.
Younger widows have much to share as well. Though they may not have lived as long, grief and sorrow develops wisdom that we can all learn from.
Beyond the wisdom, everyone has a need to be heard.
3. Take along for shopping/errands
One of my favorite things when my children were small was pick up my Granny and take her along for shopping and errands. She enjoyed the outing and the kids – I enjoyed the extra set of hands and the adult company.
4. Take a meal or leftovers – eat with them whenever possible
Cooking for one and eating alone is no fun. Share your leftovers – especially in freezable portions – but more importantly share a meal and eat with her!
5. Invite to join your family for special occasions – or just for the day
Don’t wait for your house to be quiet and clean or for the time to prepare the perfect meal. Many widows would love the opportunity to join in your family time even if that feels chaotic to you. What you consider to be a zoo might just represent the fullness of life someone else has been missing.
6. Pray
Pray for and with the widows among you. Ask them specifically how you can pray for them and ask them to pray for you.
“You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your strength, and with all your mind,’ and ‘your neighbor as yourself. ”
Luke 10:27
