by wendy | May 20, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Godly Relationships, Hospitality, Tips for Encouraging Others
God sets a wonderful example for us in how He cares for and encourages His children. In “The Encouragement of the Father,” we looked at how God encourages us by his devotion, his sensitivity and compassion, the way He promotes and pursues peace, and blesses and forgives His children.
In Romans 12, Paul writes about the responsibility of the believer to care for and encourage our spiritual family. These responsibilities perfectly reflect God’s ways toward us. While we are exhorted to encourage other believers, Paul also reminds us in 1 Timothy that we should turn our attention first to our physical family.
“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.”
1 Timothy 5:8
This Scripture is clear – meet the needs of your household first. Meeting physical needs is necessary, but let’s not forget the importance of encouragement! I love the list Paul gives us in Romans 12:9-21 titled, “Love in Action.”
Be devoted to love…
Love sincerely and be devoted to that love.
We need to demonstrate tender, unselfish love to each member of our family. The key word here is demonstrate – how can you show that love?
Share and practice hospitality.
When we are devoted to something, we pursue it faithfully, and we can do that by sharing with one another and practicing hospitality with our own people.
“Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.”
Romans 12:13
Be sensitive and compassionate…
Set the tone for joy, patience, and faithfulness.
Set the tone of encouragement in your home by the way you respond to and pray for each person. Model joy, patience and faithfulness to others and pray for them to follow your example as you follow the example of Christ.
Be sensitive and join others in their celebrations and in their sadness.
Pay close attention to the feelings of others and listen carefully to their hearts. We feel most heard and seen when we are met with understanding and respect for our feelings. Cheer your people on and take the time to sit with someone who is sad.
“Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.”
Romans 12:15
Pursue and promote peace…
Put others first and look to God to meet your needs.
Perhaps the most difficult place to be selfless is at home – expectations run high – but if we look to God to meet our needs, He will reward and bless us. Many times, when we serve one another without an agenda, we will find others following our lead.
“It is easy for us to decide that we have nothing left to give. We might say that we are exhausted, needy, used up, or beaten up. We might want to hide in a hole or lash out at irritating people around us when we feel this way, but that is not what God expects for us as His ambassadors. He wants to bring our tired and empty hearts to Him so He can fill us back up. We can exchange our dry, brittle spirit for a soft, pliable heart that has room for all of His love.”
Be a peace-seeker and a peacemaker.
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Romans 12:18
I am learning more and more that I cannot do this on my own. It requires a super-natural intervention from God to settle my own heart down and to trust Him to make peace between people. The good news is that God is a peacemaking specialist and He loves to do it! I use a strategy that I call the 3 P’s to help me in times of conflict in my own life.
The 3 P’s:
Pause – take a breath and wait before responding.
Pray – ask God to intervene in my own heart and in the heart of others involved.
Preach – to MYSELF and remind myself of God’s truth and His promises.
Bless and forgive…
Serve others even when they feel like the enemy.
God is very specific on this – we are to bless, forgive, and serve our enemies (or those who feel like the enemy in the moment) and leave any avenging to Him. This may be the most difficult thing to do, but we can trust that God is able to make things right because he is just. Anything we do for revenge is evil and does not please God.
Cling to what is good.
We had a rabbit once that latched its teeth onto the cage wire to prevent being removed from his hutch – true story. Funny picture, but this is the type of clinging we need to do – holding on to good by the skin of our teeth! And I find it takes this kind of persistence because I am constantly tempted to return to selfish motives and expectations. Sadly, they never achieve victory for me. The kind of victory I am looking for is only won when I give it all over to God and let Him have His way with me and my family – no wonder this passage is sandwiched with this concept.
“Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
Romans 12:9,21
Friends, we are responsible to encourage our people. When we look to God and seek His ways, He will give us the opportunities to encourage and the blessings will abound!
by wendy | May 13, 2020 | Encouragement, Godly Relationships, Tips for Encouraging Others
“We remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.”
1 Thessalonians 1:3
The book of James discusses faith in action and explains that the our faith results in demonstrating love for God and love for others through our actions. We cannot achieve salvation through our deeds, but our good deeds demonstrate our changed hearts and the gratitude we have for God’s grace and mercy.
“Every man shall give as he is able, according to the blessing of the LORD your God which He has given you.”
Deuteronomy 16:17
When we are encouraged by God, the natural response is to then encourage others – and perhaps one of the most practical ways we can do this is through service. When we serve others out of the abundance God has given us, we are blessed!
Here are 5 Ideas for you to serve others through Encouragement in Action:
Use the Tools I have:
We all have tools – lawn tools, business tools, kitchen tools, craft tools, educational tools, and of course regular household tools – and chances are we have tools that others do not. What a great encouragement we can offer others when we use our tools to serve each other!
Use the Skills I have:
What skills do you have? Cooking/baking, landscaping, mechanics, bookkeeping, teaching/tutoring, childcare, medical care, photography, decorating, sewing, household repair – the list could go on and on. How can you use something you are good at to encourage someone else?
Use the Time I have:
Even if we don’t own many tools or feel unskilled, we all have time (or can make time) to help someone. Offer to clean out gutters, walk the dog, make a meal, run errands, babysit, mow the grass, clean the house, check the mail, water the plants, read to a child. Think about what a difference just a little bit of time could make in someone else’s life!
Use the Money I have:
Perhaps you are super busy but have financial resources you can share. Purchase a gift card, pay for a house cleaner, donate to a cause, pay for an inspection, buy the food, purchase sports equipment, cover a bill. Go beyond a handout and use your gift to perform a needed service.
Use the Energy and Strength I have:
Energy and strength is a gift not everyone possesses. If you have even a little, give the gift of yourself to serve as a gopher, lifter, worker, digger, mover, etc. My kids make fun of my “magic finger” when I point to things that need to be done, but give someone the power to get things done in your strength as you serve and be sure to enjoy the fellowship while you work together!
“God is not unjust; he will not forget your work and the love you have shown him as you have helped his people and continue to help them.”
Hebrews 6:10
by wendy | May 12, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Godly Relationships
When my mother-in-law, Rhoda, passed away several years ago, my father-in-law gifted each of her children with a pair of her shoes – each holding a plant. We placed Rhoda’s sneakers in our garden and they serve as a fitting reminder of her legacy – she was an amazing example of Encouragement in Action.
I never saw Rhoda without her shoes on – I think she hit the floor running each day. Her feet carried her as she served others constantly. Whether she was baking cakes, scrubbing floors, delivering food, driving to the airport, or babysitting children – she was a woman in action. It took me a while to get used to her flurry of activity – especially when she came to visit. Not one to sit and chat, Rhoda cooked and canned, baked and swept, and even polished my silver. Eventually, I came to understand that was her way of showing love.
Even though I experienced her servant heart and passion for doing good deeds, I wasn’t able to put Rhoda’s life into perspective until her time here was done. The visitation for her funeral was scheduled at the largest church available in the area for three hours. People arrived early and stood in line for hours – at least two hours past the allotted time – to have the chance to say to her family, “Let me tell you what Rhoda did for me!” Friends, family, neighbors, and strangers waited patiently to acknowledge the impact my mother-in-law had on their lives. Even in her short 74 years, Rhoda’s reach was enormous – almost as big as her heart.
The significance of that day spoke to my heart in a variety of ways:
As an encourager, I was incredibly inspired.
So many women have influenced my passion to encourage others, but Rhoda specifically inspired me to have a servant heart. She never gave up – even when she was in pain herself. Serving was so deeply ingrained within her that I believe it was her lifeblood. At the root of her service was always love – love for God and love for others.
Her wide reach inspired me to consider every person I meet as an opportunity to encourage.
Rhoda’s encouragement did not discriminate. Old, young, rich, poor, social outcast, or community leader – she saw them all the same. Rhoda’s family is quite large – but it didn’t really matter if you were related or not – she treated all like family!
I am most grateful for the servant heart she planted in her son – my husband.
Rhoda didn’t operate a solo mission. She took along anyone she could – and that included her children when they were small. I am now blessed to be the partner of a mighty example of an Encourager in Action and he is passing that legacy on to our children.
When I visit my garden and my eyes come to rest on Rhoda’s shoes, I have grand visions of filling them someday. But when I shift the focus from the shoes to the thriving plant that is growing inside them, I remember that God is using her legacy to spill over and fill more than any pair of shoes could contain.
“This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of the Lord’s people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God. Because of the service by which you have proved yourselves, others will praise God for the obedience that accompanies your confession of the gospel of Christ and for your generosity in sharing with them and with everyone else. And in their prayer for you their hearts will go out to you, because of the surpassing grace God has given you. Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift.”
2 Corinthians 9:12-15
by wendy | May 5, 2020 | Encouragement, Godly Relationships, Prayer, Tips for Encouraging Others
When I think of practicing the Encouragement of Presence, I imagine sitting shoulder to shoulder and hugs and warm touches. I am looking forward to the time when that kind of presence is welcome again, but in the meantime I want to be intentional about offering my presence to those that need encouragement. Here are some practical ideas for the Encouragement of Presence during a pandemic:
1. Be Present with the ones you can be with in Person
Often I am so busy trying to encourage everyone else that I forget about the people in my house that need encouragement. As many of us are sheltering in place with our families, it seems the perfect time to reset the focus and to be present with our people. However, it still takes intentionality. Set a time for a family meal, position yourself in common areas where you can be available, start conversations, and most of all – listen. For me, this is a unique opportunity to have my people all here and I don’t want to miss it!
2. Be Present with your Voice
When you cannot be physically present with someone who needs encouragement, pick up the phone and let them hear your voice! There is something incredibly comforting about the sound of someone you know, and while a message or text is good, the pause while you listen on the phone is infinitely better than the … while your person waits for you to respond.
3. Be Present Virtually
Perhaps a step up from a phone call, a video chat allows you to hear a voice and see a face! Expression and body language are a large part of communication, and you will be a wonderful encouragement when you show up (even sans makeup)! This is also a great way to visit while doing other things – like a puzzle or project or eating a meal.
4. Be Present with Photos
Like many others, I am using some of this quarantine time to sort through old photos. It warms my heart and brings me joy to see the pictures of my grown children when they were little. Photos bring back memories and with them the feelings of being in the presence of people. As you come across pictures that would be special to others, send them along with a note of why they are special to you. The memories will make good companions even when you cannot be present.
5. Be Present with a Present
I love to joke with our kids and tell them that my presence is their presents! The truth is, at times, my present can help to remind someone of my presence. A thoughtful gift can make a person feel loved and known and your presence remains as the recipient thinks of you each time they use the gift. This can be especially true when the gift is a reminder of a special time you spent together.
6. Be Present from a safe Distance
When it comes to seeing their loved ones, people have certainly been using their creativity during this pandemic. I love the ideas of visiting through windows, driving by in cars, and sitting far apart in the yard. We can be physically present even with some distance between us. If someone needs your physical presence – be safe – but figure out how to make it happen. There really is no substitute for being with someone in person.
7. Be Present in your Prayers
Always be present in your prayers! Ephesians 2:6 tells us that we are seated with Him in the heavenly realms. If God can supernaturally seat us with Him (in prayer) while we are still here on earth then he can also cause others to feel our presence through our prayers. I have often had people say to me, “I felt your prayers,” and I believe this is what they mean. While our physical presence is important, it is not more important than ushering others into the heavenly throne room in the presence of God when we lift them up in prayer.
Friends, we need the Encouragement of Presence – even now when we are told not to be in the presence of others. Let’s use these practical ideas and not give up meeting with one another in whatever way we can.
“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing.”
Hebrews 10:23
by wendy | May 5, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Godly Relationships
God is so good to me! Whenever I am feeling lonely, He reminds me of His presence. A beautiful sunset, a special Scripture, His peace in my spirit – all of these are like a touch of His hand upon my shoulder to remind me He is there – but perhaps my favorite of all the ways He demonstrates His presence to me is through His people.
A note in the mail, a call from a friend, a smile, a hug, a kind word, a warm meal – each of these serves as a God touch to my lonely, hurting, or anxious soul. A reminder that He is here. And He sees me. And He cares.
It made me think of a favorite children’s book, The Kissing Hand, by Audrey Penn. (The link allows you to hear the author read this story.) In the story, the little raccoon doesn’t want to go to school because he would prefer to stay with his mother. In her wisdom, she gives him a kiss on the hand to remind him of her love. Each time he thinks of the kissing hand, he is encouraged. In the end, little raccoon kisses her hand back.
The encouragement of others is God’s kiss upon my hand. How amazing is it that when I encourage others it is like kissing God’s hand back?
“Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.”
Matthew 25:40
God calls us to encourage one another and demonstrate His love. How can you reach out to someone today? God might be using you as touch their lonely soul needs!
by wendy | May 5, 2020 | Encouragement, Encouragement For Your Heart, Focus on God, Godly Relationships
You may have heard me talk about my routine of journaling where I have seen God at work each week, but what I don’t often mention is that sometimes it is difficult to find something to write down. I know that God is working in my life, but I don’t always feel His presence. The wonderful thing about keeping a record though, is that I can easily look back through the weeks and read about all the ways He has been present in the past. Remembering gives me confidence to know that He is there and working – even when I don’t see it. As the Scripture (Romans 8:31) says, “If God is for me, who can be against me?”
My pastor, Jason, preached on Isaiah 40 this week and he highlighted the transcendent (above and beyond) and immanent (present and close) nature of God. Understanding these qualities encourages me in complimentary ways. When I recognize that God is bigger than any problem I can have, I am confident in His ability to protect me. When I contemplate the way that God cares for me personally, I feel seen and loved.
He tends his flock like a shepherd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart;”
Isaiah 40:11
There are many days that I feel lost and confused in this world. When I turn my eyes to God and remember that He always knows the way, the joy and peace of being a child of God returns.
“I keep my eyes always on the LORD, with him at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
You make known to me the path of life, you will fill me with joy in your presence.”
Psalm 16:8,11
Though you may not see or feel God’s presence today, spend some time reflecting on the ways that God is present with us.
God is Present through his Peace
We can experience God’s peace when we turn our worries over to Him.
“The LORD blesses his people with peace.”
Psalm 29:11
“The peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 4:7
God is Present through His Spirit
As believers, we have the gift of God’s Spirit living within us.
“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?”
1 Corinthians 6:19
“This is how we know that we live in him and he in us: He has given us of his Spirit.”
1 John 4:13
God is Present through His Word
Meditating on Scripture seats us in the presence of God.
“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.”
Psalm 119:105
“My comfort in my suffering is this; Your promise preserves my life.”
Psalm 119:50
God is Present through his People
We can usher others into the presence of God through prayer and by using the gifts he has given us.
“Where two or three gather in my name, there am I with them.”
Matthew 18:20
“The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”
James 5:16
God is Present through Jesus
God wants us to know His presence so much that He sent His son Jesus to be with us – in person! Immanuel literally means God with us. In Jesus, God made a way for us – sinners – to be with Him – holy and perfect.
“The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel (God with us).”
Matthew 1:23
“Therefore , brothers and sisters, since we have confidence to enter the Most Holy Place by the blood of Jesus, by a new and living way opened for us through the curtain, that is, his body, and since we have a great priest over the house of God, let us draw near to God with a sincere heart and the full assurance that faith brings.”
Hebrews 10:19-22
How do you experience the presence of God?
